Abuse and Violence

First things first: Do you need help?

Unsure? Visit NCADV for warning signs – but note that the URL is obvious.

Call 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY) to reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline in the US. If you are experiencing stalking, call 1-800- FYI-CALL. The Network/La Red is a great resource for people in disabled, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, BDSM, polyamorous, and queer communities: Voice: 617-742-4911 | Toll-Free: 800-832-1901 | TTY: 617-227-4911

In the UK? Call 0808 2000 247 to reach the National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline.

To find agencies that can help in other countries, visit HotPeachPages (not an obvious URL).

The following are great resources but have obvious URLs:

First-Person Accounts, Survivor Stories, and Pieces for Allies

Data & Info:



  • Family and Friends’ Guide to Domestic Violence by Elaine Weissman (Amazon)
  • He’s Just No Good for You: A Guide to Getting Out of a Destructive Relationship by Beth Wilson with Mo Therese Hannah (Amazon)
  • The Batterer as Parent: Addressing the Impact of Domestic Violence on Family Dynamics by Lundy Bancroft and Jay G. Silverman (Amazon)
  • When Love Goes Wrong: What to Do When You Can’t Do Anything Right by Ann Jones and Susan Schechter (Amazon)
  • Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft (Amazon)

Academic Research: