Review: Laya II

I received the Laya II for free from our affiliate Fun Factory in exchange for an honest review.

The Laya II is made of silicone, making it easy to grip. It’s waterproof, easy to clean, and about 4 inches in length.

One of the things that I love about Fun Factory toys is how they charge via magnetic USB. It cuts down on waste and that horrible feeling of being unable to change batteries that so many of us with hand dexterity issues know all too well.

I was really intrigued by the shape of this toy. The material plus the angle and how easy the buttons would be to reach made this, at first look, the perfect toy.

It’s ergonomic, easy to hold, and easy to control. I really like the Fun Factory button features on all their toys – and how there’s a lock feature for when I travel. Seriously, traveling with sex toys is interesting enough without a vibrating suitcase!

I tend to use my toys alone, especially the first few times. While using this, then, it’s important to note that I was using it myself.

It was certainly amazing for edging. It was enough to get me revved up but just didn’t seem to pack enough power to get me to climax. Still, I can see where it would be useful for me in times when I may be dealing with difficulty becoming aroused. Vibrations can always be helpful for that.

I was feeling a little bummed out, though, that I just couldn’t get myself to cum with this toy alone. I mean, I usually cum really easy and really quickly.

I thought of something different to try, though.

On their site, Fun Factory talks about how the Laya II can be great for a number of things including straight up massage.

It was really, really good for some of my trigger points in my upper back and neck… though, I wish it was slightly longer. That way I could reach some of the other points without contorting.

All in all, this was a fun toy. It’s a good reminder that we focus too much as a society on orgasm as the goal of any sexual play – even me – and that vibrators can be great for so many reasons. If you’re looking for a good edging or arousal toy, one to use for partner play, or just a great trigger point massager, the Laya II might be just what you need.

Review: Tantus Uncut 2

I received the Tantus Uncut 2 for free from our affiliate Vibrant in exchange for an honest review.

The Tantus Uncut 2 is a silicone dildo. It is just under six and a half inches long and about an inch and a half wide. It resembles an uncut penis, meaning that it still has foreskin.

Its predecessor, the Uncut 1, was one of the first uncut dildos I had seen. That one is also a tad bigger than the Uncut 2. I’m really glad that Tantus released this smaller version because it’s a lot easier to handle.


The Uncut 2 is pliable, but still firm. The fact that it is uncut honestly made it easier to use because the size is so much more uniform.

One of the things I liked the most was that every single angle felt different. Between that and the texture? It was much more realistic than I really expected.

It’s definitely harness-compatible and the flared base makes it safe for both vaginal and anal play. The wide base made it easy to hold onto. I will say that, even though I found this easier on my hands than many dildos, I would really have liked it if there was an easier way to hold this.

All in all, though, that’s my only improvement.

If you’re looking for an uncut dildo, you really can’t go wrong with the Uncut 2.

Review: Calice from Fun Factory

Disclosure: As a Fun Factory affiliate, I receive sex toys each month in exchange for my honest review of them. This system in no way affects my opinions of these products. This review has affiliate links.

Today, I’ll be reviewing the Calice :

First, let’s check some facts.

The Calice is made of silicone, so don’t use silicone or oily lubes as they can degrade the toy/change the consistency of the material. It’s also totally waterproof which I love. It charges through a USB cord that connects magnetically to the bottom of the device.

For those interested in stats, the Calice is 6.5 inches long and 1.4 inches in diameter. There are also six different vibration types along with six different intensities.

I’ll be real – I chose this vibrator because of the unique shape it has. It’s enough like a dildo, the top like the head of a penis. Still, the interesting shape at the top and front was intriguing. It actually made it very easy to add lube as I was able to slide the lube down the notch in the shaft.

When I opened this up, I really was most excited for the cut-out at the top. I hope that it would make this a great tool for clitoris stimulation – and I wasn’t let down. That made it great not only for targeting the clit, but the nipples and even for edging (if you haven’t tried edging, I certainly highly suggest it). The dildo-like shape, combined with the soft material, really made this an exciting toy to use, too.

I honestly became turned on just by thinking about using this toy after the first use. It’s the first sex toy I’ve gotten turned on by before using! Since I have some arousal issues, that’s saying a lot, too!

As a vagina-haver, I’m unsure how this would work for penis-havers, but this seems like a toy that would very easily stimulate the prostate from the outside via the perineum/taint. The lack of a flared base means anal play is a little risky with this toy. I certainly wouldn’t recommend it for anal play on your own, but it could potentially be okay with a partner.

calice buttons

Because of my systemic juvenile arthritis, my hands don’t always work well – especially in awkward positions like using a vibrator. I love the shape of this vibrator, though. It’s easy to hold and the buttons to change vibration and intensity are accessible while using this toy. The buttons aren’t in the way enough where I accidentally changed anything I didn’t mean to, either, which is nice.

The power is great, even on some rough fibromyalgia days. For those unfamiliar, fibro can make common sensations – even clothing – hurt. When I’m having a fibro day, I can’t be touched, wear clothing, or even have contact with rougher surfaces. Since the Calice is so soft – and easy to control with regards to sensation and intensity – it’s the only vibrator I’ve been able to use during a fibro day that didn’t cause more pain.

All in all, this toy was incredibly accessible for me. The Fun Factory lubricant combined with the toy’s effectiveness, unique shape, easy button-based controls, and power really have turned me on to more vibrators. I highly suggest it for those who enjoy dildos, vibrators, and uniquely shaped sex toys.

You can shop the general Fun Factory site using my affiliate link or go right to the Calice. Shopping using these two affiliate links is a great way to support Chronic Sex in addition to getting yourself something fun.

Review: Crescendo from Mystery Vibe

Note: I did receive the Crescendo for free, though not in exchange for this review. I’ll be blunt and honest as always.

Today, we’re talking about the Crescendo from Mystery Vibe.

The press around this toy has been impressive, being featured in a number of print and digital magazines or sites. Crescendo was even honored as one of The 10 Best Sex Toys Released in 2016 by Glamour. My big question to answer here is:

How accessible is the Crescendo to us chronically badass and disabled peeps?

First, some background & details:

Crescendo is innovative from an idea perspective. The toy arrives straight (like a space bar) but can be positioned in a number of ways. It is waterproof. There is also an app that you can utilize to control Crescendo’s vibrations.

Because the outer skin of the toy is silicone, it’s important to remember not to utilize oil or silicone-based lubes with it because that’s how damage happens. Water-based is the way to go here.

After opening Crescendo up, I was instantly struck by how snazzy the whole package was. Included with the toy: a wireless charger and a cute little satin carrying pouch. It added to the luxuriousness of the whole thing.

The first time I tried this, I was in a hotel out in Portland. Setting the mood a little bit with some sexy music from Hamilton and a few hot visualizations, I felt pretty in the mood. I decided to forgo using the app the first go-round because I wanted to see how accessible the toy was on its own.

It didn’t really impress me.

It is really difficult to change between modes/speeds while using the toy with hand dexterity issues. The mode-changing buttons were in really awkward spaces, especially if you’re handling Crescendo a lot during use.

Bending the Crescendo was a little iffy, too. I was concerned about breaking it! I didn’t need to be, but still – it hampered the mood a little bit in addition to not being super easy for my cripple hands.

There are some powerful motors in this thing. I attempted to try this out during a fibromyalgia flare. One of the symptoms I get hit with a lot is where sensations that don’t usually hurt actually do (allodynia). That normally doesn’t affect my masturbation habits or toy use, but it did here. The motors of the Crescendo are so powerful that it was uncomfortable. Combine that with how difficult it is to change modes and intensity on the Crescendo itself and there is no way I would be able to use this during a fibro flare.

When I did use the app, I had mixed feelings. It updated my Crescendo which was cool. As a part of that, I was able to access a bunch of new vibrations – ones that I honestly liked better than the heavy hitters preloaded onto the device. It was easier to switch between these and control a bit of the intensity.

wild cats setting on the mystery vibe app

However, the app would keep resetting if my phone screen went dark. This led to it having to sync with Crescendo, which meant turning it off and back on again if I wanted to change modes. Either that, or I was constantly trying to keep my phone ‘awake’ to keep everything in sync. Since I really like variety, this was a turn-off… such a turn-off that I didn’t even cum honestly.

And I usually cum pretty easily.

I thought part of the draw of this would be to have a more hands-free orgasm, but that just wasn’t possible. While the bending component was neat, Crescendo wasn’t able to bend in enough of a way to be completely comfortable and hands-free. Unless I held down this part on my clit, she didn’t get any stimulation at all.

I could see this device being fun for play with partner(s). The idea of someone controlling what my potential sexual pleasure feels like is a major turn-on. It would be incredible for teasing, just not for orgasms.

Final verdict? For now, inaccessible and not worth the money.

Between the operating difficulties, problems with the app, and the $200 price tag… this really isn’t an accessible device. It makes me sad because I feel like there is a lot of potential in this idea. That said, I know Mystery Vibe has done a few iterations of this device so far. My hope is that they can make this a little more accessible by:

  • adjusting the bending technique
  • tweaking the intensity/mode controls on the device
  • improving the app

Ideally, the price would go down, too – but, with these improvements, I might be able to to have a mind-blowing orgasm… in which case, price becomes slightly less important to me. Still, I generally would never spend this much on a sex toy because 1) I’m self-employed, 2) I’m disabled and have a ton of medical bills, and, 3) that’s a lot of money I could spend on other things.

In the future, it’s possible that this will become more accessible and actually give me an orgasm. For now, though, it’s a hard pass.